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there comes a time in every person's life when they discover the role god meant for them.


Today i realized god's purpose for me.

supreme ruler of the universe.
Think about it.
Robot dinosaurs, motorcycles, and spaceships everywhere. not to mention the women.
How could you say no?


really.

I'm taking applications for groveling henchmen.
sign up now and I'll try harder not to vaporize you with my muscular fists, or the powerful mauve ionized particle laser beam I've just invented out of 27 ataris, coal, and 2 drums of hydroxypropl marmalade sulfate.

HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

1) name

2) fighting style

3) requested wage (put anything, i'm going to ignore it)

EMPLOYMENT BENEFITS INCLUDE: DENTAL, MECHA DEATH INSURANCE, and mail forwarding.



:ninja:
Add a Comment:
 
:iconmithrendune:
MithrenDune Featured By Owner Apr 13, 2010
HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

1) Dravio De Memoris

2) Modern combat skills with study of ancient styles.

3) 200 lb. of weaponry a month.
Reply
:iconteemunkle:
teemunkle Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2009   Digital Artist
1.clint eastwood3000x.
2.threatening modern dance and intimidating mime.my interpretive dance will unravel the minds of your enemies.
3.happy tears.government arts grants.
Reply
:iconwynnter89:
wynnter89 Featured By Owner Oct 29, 2008
lmao... your good !

HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

1) Alex Wyntner aka Mindless Henchman:89

2) couch potato and "yesman" abilities

3) a couch... maybe TV.... beer...

EMPLOYMENT BENEFITS INCLUDE: DENTAL, MECHA DEATH INSURANCE, and mail forwarding. I would also like monthly urine, for the pee tests I have to pass (obviously the urine cant be mine)
Reply
:iconderbz:
derbz Featured By Owner Oct 16, 2008
1: Captain bugger

2. ten pints fists of fury

3. pies

I would request that as a henchman I would like a uniform and a pension scheme, health insurance would be handy too.

ta
Reply
:iconkrayt1138:
Krayt1138 Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2008  Hobbyist Writer
HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

1) name
Krayt

2) fighting style
Krav Maga if it really gets bad, otherwise I'll settle for a VSS Vintorez.

3) requested wage
Seeing as it goes, good-looking and open-minded human females would be a good start. We'll see to the financial bits later...
Reply
:iconmaw123:
Maw123 Featured By Owner May 28, 2008  Professional Digital Artist
HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

1) Maw is for cat 123 is for fun

2) sligh like a cat :ninja:they will never see me coming

3)More than you earncome on, you have the world i need something

P.s i may/may not assassinate you and take control, its a risk you just gona have to take.
Reply
:iconcoldcity:
ColdCity Featured By Owner May 8, 2008
1) Andrew

2) tae kwond o

3) inspiriation, no $$$
Reply
:iconsketchbook-stories:
Sketchbook-Stories Featured By Owner Apr 8, 2008
Name: henchman #12

style: can wander aimlessly for hours. will occasionaly investigate meaningless noises. i will walk blindly into any courner so as to make sure nothing is hiding there. i can also shoot an automatic weapon with minimal proficiency but i look good in whatever jumpsuit costume you hand out.

Wages: $7.50 / hr. my boss at the taco bell is killing me.
Reply
:iconsketchbook-stories:
Sketchbook-Stories Featured By Owner Apr 8, 2008
1) Salmon

2) 2nd degree blackbelt in tae quando...and only weigh 120 pounds so if you built a cloner you could carry at minimum 1/3 more of me in one transport ship. : D

3) poptarts....me want poptarts..........................RAR!!!
Reply
:iconiandiam:
iandiam Featured By Owner Apr 8, 2008   Artisan Crafter
I don't 'hench' very well - I've tried, believe me - it usually ends in a pulled muscle. I guess I'm not the 'henching' type or build.

I do wonder, however, if I could get in on the motorcycles and women as your personal chef? I'm pretty sure I could use some o'that hydroxypropyl marmalade sulfate to make a wicked torte.

is there an application for such? I'll use the 10-T form

1.) Lord Scarpiciatta

2.) subsonic santoku

3.) motorcycles and women (duh.)

Very nice work, keep er' up.
Reply
:icondmitry1990:
Dmitry1990 Featured By Owner Apr 4, 2008   Digital Artist
NOT SO FAST! Its obvious im way more qualified for the job. UNIVERSE IS MINE!
Reply
:iconshadowed-light-waves:
shadowed-light-waves Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2008   General Artist
Wow! :wow: Your gallery is amazing! :faint:

I'd get behind a world run by you. :ahoy: Hah.



Reply
:iconagirl3003:
Agirl3003 Featured By Owner Jan 30, 2008  Student Filmographer
1) I have no name!

2) PIKO-PIKO HAMMER OF DOOM!

3) Unlimited amount of err...sushi! =D teehee

Sorry couldn't resist XD
Reply
:iconcheeseforthesoul:
cheeseforthesoul Featured By Owner Nov 30, 2007
Oooh! Pick me!

1) name: Nanook

2) fighting style: ground and pound, overwhelming firepower

3) wage: fud, schladies
Reply
:iconevoeight:
evoeight Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2007  Hobbyist Photographer
HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

1) no name Jim... oh wait, Jim

2) really bad flatulence followed by denial

3) national minimum wage
Reply
:iconbahumut:
Bahumut Featured By Owner Oct 9, 2007
HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT PART-TIME APPLICATION 10-PT
Name - Bahamut
Fighting Style - Dual-Katanas/knives/cwellan
Requested Wage - Can you pay my electricity bill?

Does your dental plan give free toothpaste?
Reply
:iconnoxartemus:
NoxArtemus Featured By Owner Sep 20, 2007
1) name: Nox Artemus

2) fighting style: Liquid Shape Shifting and Metal Tooth Picks

3) requested wage: Hamster Souls. >_>
Reply
:iconflyingpurplepig:
FlyingPurplePig Featured By Owner Jul 31, 2007
I know this post is over a year old, and I have no idea who you are, but I couldn't resist...

HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

1) F.....l.....y....i.....Am I spelling this too fast for you?

2) Biting things.

3) I'd like to be paid in legos. Purple ones.
Reply
:icongweena14cool:
gweena14cool Featured By Owner Jul 19, 2007
1)bwuhahaha! i mean...evil person...no that's a horrible name...call me bob, yes bob, it's perfect!!!

2)blowing things up(and according to my sister annoying people to death, but that could have its advantages)

3)frozen socks...don't ask
Reply
:iconzimdollar:
zimdollar Featured By Owner Jul 16, 2007
HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

1) Useless Bastard #23

2) Milling around aimlessly

3) One pair of shoes every 4 years
Reply
:iconsne-aks:
Sne-aks Featured By Owner Jun 29, 2007  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

Name:) Sneaks

Fighting Style:) Never See It Coming

Requested Wage:) More than the opposition offers me.


Awesome journal entry...and to think, I was just randomly stopping by.
Reply
:icondragonspeaker:
dragonspeaker Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2007  Hobbyist General Artist
HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

1) Docta S.

2) Lightning fast fencing attacks using a stolen Grammar Police baton.

3) Your mom. Or any hubcaps you happen to find along the road.

...I could use the mail forwarding.

(Kickass gallery, congrats on the Daily Deviation!)
Reply
:iconkiranofutago:
KiraNoFutago Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2007
Name: Because I Can

Fighting style: Secret unnamed technique involving moldy baby barf and a rusty piece of paper.

Requested wage: Provide the babies. And the paper. :heart:
Reply
:iconjninja:
jninja Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2007
1) Jack
2) dirty tricks, to include booby traps, applied psychology, and FRIVILOUS LAWSUITS...also proficient in unarmed combat, as well as close range shooting, and cooking breakfast....poisoned breakfast that is...
3) I pay you...in jose ole burritos....and you give me all the orphans of your enemies...under age 7.....for an evil ninja army....

also some stippers would be cool
Reply
:iconagateophile:
agateophile Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2007
HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

1.) Christopher Simon

2.) up, down, A, B

3.) occasional recognition of existence, possibly significance
Reply
:iconb0dom:
b0dom Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2007
ahahaha
i cant say no even if im not interested in women ahahahahahaha
your gallery rocks!
Reply
:iconskyrail:
Skyrail Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2007
:laughing:
Reply
:iconjaala:
Jaala Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2007
1) Name: Dani

2) Fighting Style: very Vicious Smart Assery and intelligence. Can strip any opponent of his/her dignity, self respect and self esteem in 2 minutes within earshot.

3) requested wage: The power behind the throne, to be your right man woman.
Reply
:iconsailorstarnite:
sailorstarnite Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2007  Professional Traditional Artist
Name: Henchman #34

Fighting Style: Throwing myself at anything that comes near the boss while yelling incoherently

Requested Wage: More than current employer (The Joker pays us in gag money)

Is this part time or full time henchmaning? And do you mind if we moonlight for uncool, underdog villains?
Reply
:iconseimeis:
seimeis Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2007
1) That girl who looks like a librarian

2) Patient cunning and diplomacy. Sneakiness. Every good henchparty needs somebody with those skills. I might turn on you later, but only if you turn out to be an inadequate leader, and I'm sure that would never happen. :meditate:

3) In all truth, I'm signing up for the dental plan. Do you know how hard it is to get a job with a good dental plan?
Reply
:iconcarmelward:
Carmelward Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2007   General Artist
Name: Helga Von Struufle
Style: Oragami Chopsticks
Wage: I want some slaves...a lil cohort of them, and £900,000 a year.
Reply
:iconshadystar:
shadystar Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2007
are there any applications for evil ninjas...not necessarily henchmen...because i do plan to betray you and plot against you at some point
Reply
:icondace-armada:
Dace-Armada Featured By Owner Jun 7, 2007
HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

1) Name: Dace

2) Fighting Style:Kick your assery(Battle ax)
No joke I can wield one:D

3) Requested Wage:The heart of my victims:D
Reply
:iconvinylbutterfly:
VinylButterfly Featured By Owner Feb 10, 2007   Digital Artist
HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

1) Name: Bec

2) Fighting Style: Judo(1year training), Karate (3 years training) and Kick Boxing (1 year training)

3) Requested Wage: Food/Water and perhaps some shelter?
Reply
:iconultra-seven:
ultra-seven Featured By Owner Feb 10, 2007
HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

1) Name:
That Asian Kung-Fu Guy (TAG for short)

2) Fighting Style:
Foot-to-Ass-or-Back-of-Hand-Across-Face

3) Requested Wage:
Just enough to buy liquor at a GREAT strip joint
Reply
:iconblack-energeh:
black-energeh Featured By Owner Feb 9, 2007
HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

1) Name:
Chibi Pumpkin Spice

2) Fighting Style:
I battle with my supa powers

3) Requested wage:
Food!
Reply
:icondiscarded:
discarded Featured By Owner Oct 22, 2006
1) name: Two times the square root of eight.

2) fighting style: Iowa

3) requested wage: However much I can glean from your checking account before you finally notice.
Reply
:iconextremendousness:
extremendousness Featured By Owner Jul 1, 2006  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
1) joe kick ass (nickname: ghetto fabulous ass)

2) lighting fast wit (or, if i'm feeling lazy, your face)

3) free access to teh women

:D
Reply
:iconbananalicious:
bananalicious Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2006  Professional General Artist
i will be the anti!! u will never succeed!!!!!!! :D
Reply
:iconbongoshock:
bongoshock Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2006
1) E to the Izz-L

2) tae kwon don't

3) 5 millions peksi
Reply
:iconjstr:
jstr Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2006
HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

1) Dr. Pepper the third

2) "Ping-ah-hu!" (strange chineese/american/sweedish/turkish/japaneese technique passed on by 3 foot monks in the best mountains of the world bar and grill.)

3) Secret haircutter.
Reply
:iconkeriberrygirl:
Keriberrygirl Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2006  Student
HENCHMAN EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION 10-T

1) Name: Keri (aka: The Keriyaki Kid)

2) Fighting Style: Kung-Pow! No wait, that's a sauce and/or movie.

3) Requested Wage: N/A. just don't kill me


Note: Please forward all mail to my agent. Thank you for your time, and I hope my application will be considered. :P
Reply
:iconbobtheraccoon:
bobtheraccoon Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2006  Professional Traditional Artist
1)Napolean Dynamite

2)Bow Staff Skills

3)Anything, just pay me so stupid Kip will get off my back, GOSH!
Reply
:iconanacrothe:
Anacrothe Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2006
silence?
Reply
:iconanacrothe:
Anacrothe Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2006
(oops sorry, when i said "silence?" journal was completely empty)
Reply
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